The toy catalogs have been invading our dining room table for months. They’re all over the house now. Each one with toys and games circled in them. Some with full pages circled. Toys and games I know they are not going to play with. Toys and games that have no business going into the overly crowded toy room. My husband and I decided that we had to put an end to all the want, wants. We told them that they can only put four things on their list to the big, jolly guy. That’s it. We told them to think long and hard about it. We also let them know that it doesn’t mean they are getting all four of those things.
For the past few weeks they have been racking their brains and changing their minds. Finally, over the weekend, I told them they needed to get their lists down on paper. Afterall, this elf needs to get to her workshop and get the toys into the sack.
Logan and Deacon sat at the table with their pencils and crayons drawing and writing what they wanted for Christmas. I’m going to warn you right now, my kids are odd. They’re not asking for DS or Skylanders or any high-ticket items, aside for Deacon’s request for a trampoline. Ready?
First on Logan’s list was a taxidermy rattle snake. Yes, you read that correctly. A taxidermy rattle snake. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the term, it means a real dead rattle snake that has been stuffed! Like this.
Seriously!? What seven year old puts that on the top of the Christmas list to Santa? I then explained to him that elves are the masters of making toys. Elves are not masters in taxidermy. He then changed his request to a rattle snake that “looks really, real like.” Fabulous.
Next on the list was a plush Deadly Nadder from How To Train Your Dragon. Have we forgotten that the movie came out in 2009 and Walmart no longer sells their toys? You can’t get them anywhere. But apparently “elves can make what ever toy they want to mom.” I had do some eBay shopping last year to pull off Christmas. Lucky for me I remembered that they had a store on the website How To Train Your Dragon LIVE. (Again, that was a great show.) $30.00 for a cheap, polyester stuffed dragon. Great.
For his other two choices he requested a new kid tent and a treasure chest or lock box to keep his treasures in. Doable and typical of a boy his age, but my father in law did make him a treasure chest (but apparently we need to have a lock and key).
Deacon’s been going back and forth on a lot of things, but there is one thing on the list that he has been asking about for months now. The Darth Maul dual lightsaber. He’s always asking for it. Then he threw me for a loop and requested a purple lightsaber. In all my Star Wars years and experience I didn’t know there was a purple lightsaber. We have red, blue, and green. Thankfully a friend of mine sent me a link, there is in fact a purple lightsaber. Mace Windu, who ever that is. Okay, Santa can do these and there is room in the toy box for them.
Then he slammed me with a trampoline and a GBOP. A G-what? Of course he brings me the catalog with the GBOP. Looks like a lot of fun. Here’s the issues I have. Where do you put it? Also, it is guaranteed to end up rolling through a disguised pile of dog crap that we missed during clean up. Now that’s just gross. I don’t even want to go there.
Finn has just been pointing to everything in the BassPro catalog. I seriously think we have issues with this little boy. He really, really wants the suction cup arrows, bow, and the inflatable deer. I don’t know what I am going to do with him.
Scrolling through “really, real like” rattle snakes is going to give me nightmares tonight. What are your kiddos asking for? Any odd requests?