Being a full-time working mom always brings on the mommy guilt, but now that Logan is older and out of school for the summer I’m finding that the guilt has intensified. I feel absolutely horrible every morning I leave my house to go to work. It’s almost like that first time you have to leave your baby and head back to the workforce. You just want to cry. Now that they are older, they’re sad and you’re just not there to make them happy. They just want to be with you. Those days aren’t going to last forever.
On the morning of Logan’s first day of summer vacation Deacon stated, “It’s summer now right Mom?” Of course I replied yes even knowing I was about to get nailed with guilt. “That means we can go to the beach today! *fist pump and little dance*.” Then I disappointed them for the first time this summer. It was Thursday and I had to go to work. It’s been one week of summer vacation and it seems like every morning I’m saying “No, sorry guys.” You would think, hey there are always weekends, but as you all know the summer weekends are usually filled with weddings, graduations parties, birthday parties, etc. I need to learn to RSVP “No,” which I do try to do when I can.
Logan was the only one up this morning before I left for work. His request today…”Mom you know where we haven’t been in such a long time? Can we go there today PLEASE!?” I knew exactly where he was talking about. He was right, we haven’t been there in three years. The aquarium. More guilt. He asks to go all of the time. I feel awful. So my mission when I head to work tomorrow morning is to check the calendar and take a vacation day and head to the aquarium with my family. A day without any mommy guilt is just what this mommy needs.
Mommy guilt sucks. Spit in its face and tell it to take a hike (Then apologize for your bad behavior and tell it you should have simply said “no thank you” and turned on your heel).
It just spit back in mine!! The boys are home with dad making periscopes out of paper towel rolls and being sword-fighting pirates.
Ask them to make you one and join in at 5:15 (or whenever you get home from work).
Cheers!
I feel for you Sheri! I am sure it is hard to leave those three cutie pies everyday and sit in an office. I have been trying to be a little more productive during the week to spend more time with Chloe on the weekends. Not easy though!!!
Mommy guilt really IS the worst isn’t it?! No one prepares us for that…certainly it was never mentioned in the “What Not to Expect” books.
I think it is brilliant to take a day off for no other reason than to do a family day trip some where. I have to say those are some of my favorite days because there really isn’t any where you need to be at a certain time and you can put everything else aside.
Enjoy!!!
Never feel guilty – never! It is obvious that you are a wonderful mother!
I’m with jmgoyder that you are very clearly an awesome mom, but I know how hard the mommy guilt hits. In fact, I think sometimes the better the mom, the worse the guilt. 🙁
I have to agree here. Taking a day off to spend time with the kids really speaks volumes to your kids. We all have mom guilt, whether we stay home or work. The boys are lucky to have dad time as well.
Like jmgoyder said above, you shouldn’t feel guilty, but no matter what anyone says, a good mom will feel guilty any time they have to disappoint their kids. One of the posts I read regularly is ‘newofthetimes’. Over the past week, there have been many discussions about woman’s success in the workplace, the guilt they feel if they’re working moms – guilt about not being with their kids, guilt about not being a good employee when they do take time off to be with their kids. It’s a vicious circle and there was quite a discussion in an effort to resolve the problems with this issue. Of course, there is no resolution until corporations take into consideration that a person is not strictly an employee, they have a life outside the workplace and bosses need to consider how hard it is for their employees to find balance in their lives. It’s not always about the bottom line – money. A balance will only happen when companies begin to give out more holiday time so moms can spend time with their families without the guilt. Until that time, here’s a hug. 🙂
I understand this part. Although I only work 3 days out of the week, the days you leave the kiddo(s) are horrible. I find there is a double standard on women these days. Many of us have to work AND take care of the family. I try to keep telling myself that when the kids are older they will soon understand. I hope. We just have to keep trying the best we can and hope that someday we can be home with our kids……at least during the summer.
Have a backwards day, breakfast for dinner, or dessert for dinner and if you let them stay up late , can they sleep n until you’ve run off to work…..?
Teaching 32 kids was tough, but while they were in elementary we were off together, so that was easier….you’ll have to be creative!
Great ideas. We like to change it up from time to time to make things a little special…like tents in the living room and night time strolls with glow-sticks.
Super fun!